Blog template Rock the Crossbar: #5 Ranking for Life???

Rock the Crossbar

Thursday, March 16

#5 Ranking for Life???

Oh, the simple days...remember? You know, the time when the USA was not a soccer power and wasn't expected to be ranked higher by FIFA than teams like France (WC98 winner, ranked #8), England (WC66 winner, ranked #9), Italy (WC34, 38, 82 winner, ranked #12) and Germany (WC54, 74, 90 winner, ranked #22)??? Don't forget about #23 Uruguay (WC30, 50 winner)!!! But now, we're #5 baby...and we owe it all to John Harkes. No matter that he was benched in WC98 because Steve Sampson found out that the "captain for life" had slept with the wife of one of his teammates. That would be nit-picking. No, thanks to John, the USA media can now affirm this ranking by placing completely unrealistic expectations on a team that has been placed in a "group of death" and has never beaten Mexico at Azteca! WE are awesome!!! I mean, that win over Poland in the snow was just breathtaking and I'm sure it sent a lot of fear through the hearts and minds of the Czechs, Italians and those crazy kids from Ghana. Why thank John Harkes? Uh, why NOT thank him should be the question! Look at those teeth, that spiked hair, the "director of youth development" for DC United title. Let Argentina keep its Maradona, England its Hurst...we have Harkes. I say dust off the ole' #6 and let him suit up with the #5 ranked team on the planet!!!

11 Comments:

  • I'll be the first to have a laugh at John Harkes' expense (the footage of him visibly asking "What happened?" after Agoos coughed up a goal at RFK against Jamaica during qualifying for 1998...well, it's priceless if you could have been bothered to have watched it in the first place). And tell you what...find a team that has beaten Mexico at Azteca when it's mattered...and then we'll talk...it's a short list.

    By Blogger Glazer Shmazer, at 10:20 PM  

  • Uh...even a blind squirrel finds a nut once every so often. The fact that we have NEVER beaten Mexico in Mex. City (we like to blame it on altitude, smog, etc.) is PATHETIC. Here's an idea: how about finding/nurturing some creative midfielders and poachers from the Hispanic and African-American urban communities instead of relying upon suburban, spoiled, passionless white kids? Until soccer becomes, like the rest of the planet, the sport of the people in the USA, we won't win crap.

    By Blogger George Cuddy, at 10:53 AM  

  • Kick the toffs out! We need more yobs with the cut and thrust to grind out results.

    By Blogger Chris P, at 11:07 AM  

  • I find Chris P's comments appalling. Absolutely shocking.

    By Anonymous Broxton Ashton Morgan, at 11:12 AM  

  • This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    By Blogger TheBusbyBoy, at 12:34 PM  

  • Fair points, GAC, I suppose, but I don't think we're using smog, altitude, and the rest as excuses when the rest of the world - real footballing powers - have all said the same thing when playing matches there during WC '86 and in 1970. As for finding and nurturing the players you describe, I don't suppose you could be bothered to know anything about Memo Gonzalez or Eddie Johnson, to say nothing of the fact that Clint Dempsey basically grew up in trailer park East Texas (not quite the comfort of North Dallas suburbs) or that Landon Donovan (admittedly a pu$$y in many respects) spent time in his youth on and off food stamps. It's convenient to point to DaMarcus Beasley, as well, although he grew up in relative comfort in Fort Wayne, IN, and not on the West Side of Chicago. The 1998 to 2002 teams represent, I think, a changing of the guard in the U.S. National Team in a very real way. But knowing how closely you follow your country's national team, I'm sure you already know that.

    By Blogger Glazer Shmazer, at 1:58 PM  

  • dems fightin words.

    By Blogger TheBusbyBoy, at 2:22 PM  

  • George I never noticed before, but you look just a little bit like Mr Harkes!

    By Blogger Patrick Devitt, at 6:37 PM  

  • I will defer all questions about Ms. Harkes to Amy Wynalda. And, uh, Mr. Shmazer, I love Clint Dempsey and DaMarcus Beasley - we just need about fifty more guys like that (grit, hustle, beat defenders 1v1, can connect passes - unlike Frankie H., even though he is one of my UCLA boys; I hate him ever since Arena said "I like him because he runs a lot."). So, yes, leave the future to Dempsey (apparently a relative of Jack - we need more fighters) and Beasley. And, for Patrick Devitt, I do not look like John Harkes. He is far too pretty.

    By Blogger George Cuddy, at 7:42 PM  

  • Harkes sucks but i did laugh when he was made captain for life (summing up just how daft America treated soccer back then) and was then removed!!! I hope the Wynalda story is true - i hate Wynalda.

    By Blogger Simon Burke, at 12:34 PM  

  • This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    By Blogger Simon Burke, at 12:34 PM  

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